| | Whoo! One more semester down, and one more semester left until ROTATIONS?! WOW what happened?! Well, unlike last year, this semester had plenty of its challenges – difficult ICARE lectures (and very relevant ones!), the uncertainty of how this lecture would play itself out, what the relationship would look like, if I would wallow in the sin of self-pity, who knows? But as I saw over tidbits of time, God has proved himself to remain faithful and true, even when I haven’t! And that’s sweet news! Like the second generation of Israelites, another milestone will be laid down to hopefully serve as a memorial and testimony of God’s faithfulness (see Joshua 4:6-7). Here are some tidbits and examples of how that was played out over the semester: 1. The Endo/Repro midterm. Most of it was on Diabetes which is a dense topic alone and is worthy of having 80% of the exam being tested on it! Keep in mind that the day before was Sunday and my wonderful godly lady was down visiting me; I honestly put in the effort to study and was trusting God in the midst of it, yet I still felt this sense that I was inadequately prepared for the exam (oh, and the exam was worth 40% of my final grade!). Not that I was fretting; I wanted to have a right handling of the material before taking the exam! So up came the exam, and in the midst of taking the test I knew and trusted that God was going to work this out for my good, as he had promised in Romans 8:28 (what a relief that exams are part of God’s sanctifying, redemptive plan!); upon submitting the online exam, lo and behold, an 85! I was so stunned and was praising God in the midst of the results! Now came the ID (Infectious Disease) exam 10 days later… 2. If the Endo/Repro midterm was tough, the ID exam makes the previous midterm look like a walk in the park! Covering different types of antibiotics, spectrum of activity, mechanisms of action, adverse effects, drug interactions (overwhelming yet?) – I felt even more inadequate taking this exam! So I did what I could: trust God, and study! Took the exam, trusted God, and 88?! 3. Endo/Repro FINAL only 8 days after! Same thing, except one major problem. I say this to my shame: the problem was that I refused to believe God’s promises and bought the lie that he cannot control the Endo/Repro final (even if they are legitimate justifications, namely how professing Christians abuse God’s promises to satisfy their wants). By God’s grace though he pulled me out of that mess and helped me to stand back up on the solid rock of Christ, take the exam, get an 80, walk out with a B for the module, and surprise Joce by coming home earlier than expected! 4. Celebrating 4 years of grace on Halloween! 5. The “November storm”… or so I thought! November was a busy month, averaging about 2 major assignments (papers, exams, presentations) starting in November and rolling over into the first week of December. One of them, the Patient Encounter for SPA (Standardized Patient Assessment), I saw as a clear marker of God’s faithfulness… and why I didn’t see that at first!!? Anyway, I thought I felt prepared, and during the encounter I could bring in a 3 x 5 inch note card with anything I wanted to put on it. One problem… I LEFT IT OUTSIDE IN THE HALL! God did get me through that, and I figured that I was going to take a major hit on that (as if my tone couldn’t give it away!?), but I tried to remedy that by thinking that in reality I won’t have note cards to help me out in interacting with patients and counseling them on their therapy (which is true, but Christ was absent in that sentimental realistic perspective). But then this thought hit after recovering from the “anticipated damage”: Does our Master control the storms the same way he does with the sun? And the answer to that is a resounding YES! So back came the grade sheet, and I was expecting a C (if that!); much to my surprise, and another evidence of God’s faithfulness, I scored a 33.6 out of 40! And there’s more: some folks got 3 points added onto their grade to curve, so I walked out with a 92! You have no idea how huge of a relief that brought; praise God that was done and over with! The rest of the exams were okay, and God was faithful in them all as he was with the above! 6. The last one was the ID final. Coming from one of the toughest professors, 400+ slides he covered (no joke!), and I missed out on one of those lectures that were about 100 slides long! The lies were circulating and I definitely entertained them – what if I failed? What if I have to repeat this course? What will my Joce and my parents think? FAILURE… You blew it! One more year you both must wait! And plus, why am I here studying? Why am I not having fun like everyone else? This isn’t FAIR!!! Where’s my bonus from Walgreens when others are receiving bonuses? God is good… to them! Now how about to me?! I bought the lies of self-pity, and much to my shame, along comes Jocelyn, and through my words, I essentially say “Wanna know what’s up? HERE YOU GO!!!!” Thankfully, because she’s godlier than I am (which is true!), she didn’t respond back sinfully! She was able to help me see that I wanted ease and comfort way too much, and that I let a legitimate desire to relax after a hard semester turn into an idolatrous craving; at the same time, encourage that this is only a season and that I won’t have to worry about exams two years later (which is good news!)! By God’s grace, he gave me grace to repent, and came equipped with swords for the exam. God allowed the weather to be favorable, and I finished the exam with a 68; the most important mark of success was the grace God gave me to put to death sinful thoughts and desires with the truth of his word. So the final results for the semester? 2 A’s, 4 B’s, and 2 C’s! I’m thankful that God provided the grace to get through this semester, as well as endure. One of the major goals I have next semester is to grow in trusting God in the midst of the trials, and to be able to see things from an eternal perspective, that God is working this out for my good, that he is success, and will prove himself to be faithful yesterday, today, and forever. |
